In a world where intimacy is constantly evolving, does engaging in phone phone sex count as cheating? Secure adult chat lines now offer any consenting adult a forum in which they can explore their fantasies and get experimental, further blurring the traditional cheating-monogamy boundary. In this short article we’re going to take a look at arguments from both sides of the divide so that you can make up your own mind. Let’s start with some simple definitions and build from there.
What is cheating?
Every relationship has its own unique boundaries, both emotional and physical. Some couples will simply brush off a drunken kiss with a third person, while to others it could be a tipping point. The same is true for emotional connections — each couple has their own rules, often unspoken, covering what is and isn’t allowed.
For a relationship to stay the course, there needs to be clear boundaries, mutual trust, and open communication to cover all of the grey areas. One issue is that the digital age has made it easier than ever before to try new things. Every day thousands of callers are speaking with real women on live lines as they explore adult chat and phone sex. Couples need to think about whether this constitutes cheating within the boundaries of their own relationship. The same is true of recorded intimate stories as they might be seen as okay by one person but cheating by the other.
Perspectives on phone sex
There are two ways you can look at this and which one you choose will depend on the nature of your relationship:
- Phone sex is cheating if you want to rule out all forms of emotional intimacy with other people, including intensely emotional chat with another consenting adult
- Phone sex is harmless fun if you see it as a chance to live out a fantasy without breaking the boundary of physical intimacy. Some couples will see listening to recorded stories as no different to reading an erotic novel, for example
The key point here is that everything is down to how you and your partner choose to look at it. We’re talking, of course, about viewing phone sex within the context of your relationship.
Why context matters
There is a big difference between having an affair and engaging in phone sex with a neighbour and talking on an adult chat line. The first is personal and opens the door to physical infidelity. The second could be seen by many couples as nothing more than playing out a fantasy.
There is also a difference between developing feelings for the person on the other end of the line and using the call as a way to fulfill a specific fantasy. Repeatedly talking intimately to someone you know and are seeing is clearly different to speaking to a professional for an introduction to BDSM or exploring a new kink or fetish as a one-off experience.
Not all types of phone sex were created equal and it’s up to each couple to figure out where the line lies. There’s no right or wrong answer, it’s just that the two of you need to be in agreement. If you’re not, someone may get hurt and accusations of cheating could be made. The key is to make sure you communicate in a way that is clear, open, and always honest.
The key to open communication
If you have never thought about phone sex before, it can come across as something of a grey area. It’s not outright cheating but it’s also not 100% loyalty to a partner either. The only way to figure out where your personal boundaries lie is to be open:
- Be honest about where you each feel the boundaries should be and how they make you feel about one another
- Let one another know if there’s a specific fantasy you want to play out and how you would like to go about it
- Think about how engaging with professionals via adult chat lines could change the dynamic of your relationship
It’s also really important to remember that there are different types of phone sex. You may say it is okay to listen to pre-recorded adult content but not to have phone sex on a live call, for example. Being transparent about each call and what it consists of is the way to maintain trust and protect your relationship.
Final thoughts
Phone sex can be live, pre-recorded, or linked to a specific kink or fantasy, but that’s not the key point. What is key is that the definition of cheating depends on the unique boundaries of your relationship, and they can only be set as a result of open and honest communication at every stage. Keep the channels of communication open, never shy away from chatting through new possibilities, and always treat one another with mutual respect. Do these three things and you’ll never have to face the upset of cheating accusations.
